Festive Review Special- Die Hard (or Yippee Ki Yay Father Christmas)

Today's Christmas song is special because it's my favourite and it's actually Christmas. It also fit's because it really shouldn't be a Christmas song given the lyrical content and neither should Die Hard given the... Well, you know. It's Die Hard. Well, Christmas is when this comes out. I'm writing this in early December and you'll no doubt be reading it after waking from your food coma on Boxing Day. Regardless, here is Fairy tale of New York, performed on a rooftop in actual New York. Now, enjoy your festivities and may your turkey not give you the shits for the next few days.

Having grown up after the 90s, I only know Die Hard as a film franchise that is pretty much a parody of itself. It has action scenes that are preposterous, is largely uncharming and contains nowhere near the right amount of violence. That's why I was surprised to learn of the love people have for the original film and even more surprised when I realised it's an excellent film. That's right, Die Hard is good. This may come as a shock to some of you but I'm really not lying.

The story of Die Hard is... Well, I'm not going to lie, it's not that great. John McClaine comes home to LA to see his wife and ends up having to save about thirty hostages from one of the coolest terrorists ever: Hans Gruber. Anyone who denys how cool and well acted this character is (played to perfection by Alan Rickman), is clearly wrong. Gruber is a villain who isn't afraid to carry out his threats and is the perfect ying to John McClaines yang. Speaking of which, holy shit. John McClaine is one of the best action film characters ever due to his tendency to kill lots of foreign bad guys, drop one liners and be a badass. If anything, this film has already made me sad about the decline of this character in the later films. In this film, while the rooftop jump is pretty far fetched, John isn't the unkillable badass of later films. He only gets shot once in the shoulder, a wound that a man could recover from. He steps on broken glass and then bleeds heavily from them for a little while. He does not plummet ten floors, land on the ground and then walk it off, all while being fifty.

Something else that this films deserves credit for is the tension. I knew most of the events that would unfurl going into this film but every single scene was still a pulse racer. Because John wasn't totally unkillable, you felt he was at risk in every scene. And even if John comes out alive, the hostages may not. The stakes are raised early on with the very hostile takeover by the terrorists. If you aren't going to co-operate, you won't make it. It's also very tense because the true motivations of the terrorists aren't really revealed until later on. You're spending the whole film, along with John, trying to figure out this plan. You're engaged from very start to very finish.

One other thing that sets this film apart is that it has actual violence. This may sound both like a silly request and a silly thing to not have but you'd be amazed. Action films need to be violent. Reliance on violence is not good but no violence is worse. That's why it's a pleasure to see blood in this. And not just sad little CGI blood spurts, these are proper blood pellets. It means that blood has an actual effect. You revisit old areas of the tower and these blood stains are still splattered around. Plus, in the action scenes, it means the fight looks real, feels real and looks awesome. Modern film makers take note: always have blood in action scenes and always make sure you use practical effects where you can, blood being one of them.

Basically, ignoring it's credentials as a Christmas film, this film is a must watch. It is perhaps one of the best action films I've ever seen and makes a lot of modern films look really bad. If a film over twenty years old can be this amazing, why can't the new ones? Watch this film and mourn for the loss of good mainstream action films. Because Die Hard is an excellent film and easily earns a